Deen is on the phone, cooking sopes at the same damn time.

Call me cynical or even humorless, but when will rappers learn? Seriously? What’s the damn point in putting Future on a hook if you aren’t aiming for the charts? I mean, I fux with gritty and gully-sounding shit more than the next person, but some shit oughta qualify as no-brainers. Sure, Future can do this kinda stuff and the execution is beyond reproach in a deranged robot way, but it all feels utterly pointless to this Pusha T fan.

After all, the point of all this shit is supposed to be earning Pusha a release date for his proper solo effort. Efforts like this aren’t getting us any closer to the promised land. That’s not to say this isn’t a good song, but it certainly isn’t the kind of song that gets a release date. I’ll go ahead and make a shitty analogy: this is the equivalent of a field goal when we really need a touchdown – Pusha is putting points up on the board, but not enough. At the very least, can someone at Def Jam or G.O.O.D. Music do us a favor and stop labeling stuff like this as “singles”? Their understanding of the term “single” over there is seriously flawed in 2012 if they think “Pain” is the kind of track that’ll get Pusha a buzz.

And the ridiculous thing is that I don’t even blame Pusha T one bit. I fux with his music and the bars too much to indulge my inner jackass. I’m going to go ahead and blame Kanye. Why? Because I can. The Clipse may never have been a commercial juggernaut and struggled with a release date for their sophomore album (more due to label reorganization woes than the quality of the music), but we never doubted that they were in good hands with regards to singles.

Say what you want about Chad & Pharrell, they could always get a Clipse song (or 4) in rotation. Basically, Yeezy is whiffing and wasting one of the best rappers working today. Then again, I’d probably lack focus if I got to bury my schlong in Kim Kardashian whenever I wanted. Shiiiiiiiet, I lose focus and money over much more mediocre bitches every other weekend or so.

Again, I dig this shit and I get the dark vibe thing it has going for it, but to reiterate, this is not the move for Pusha T right now. At this rate he’s going to become a criminal-minded and ridiculously over-skilled version of 2Chainz/Weezy/Luda/rapper-du-jour capable of churning out dope guest verses while receiving less acclaim for his own work. I do not approve. The frustrating thing is that I know Kanye knows exactly how he could have elevated this to PROPER single material (trust me on this – if I know, I know he knows), but he’s either being too lazy or can’t take his dick outta Kim’s ass for long enough to give a fuck about a Pusha T single. This shit is so damned devoid of melody and drenched in enough auto-tune to make Pusha sound as if he’s rapping over a pair of Army infantry cyborgs being forced to copulate at gunpoint.

Basically, it all boils down to a single question when you’re analyzing a rap SINGLE in 2012: “do bitches want to dance to this shit?” If the answer ain’t a resounding twerk, then get the fuck back in the studio and try again. Maybe give it a another 2 months and rip off Uncle Luke like French Montana did. Trust me, these bitches won’t mind. At all. They never do…

Download:
MP3: Pusha T ft. Future – “Pain” (prod. by Kanye West) (Left-Click)