10. We need an authoritative Russian figure to babble about Sputnik–such as the one seen at the commencement of the video. Indeed, he’s got a forceful dynamism that Henry “Fester” Paulson lacks. Maybe our fearless leader might consider sending Condi over to Putti Put to test her Slavic language skills. It worked for Iceland–after all–like Roc-A-Fella, Russia has “the money.” On an unrelated note, I refuse to believe it’s just a coincidence that US-Russo relations plunged to a 20-year low after Dubya decided to give their Prime Minister a nickname that sounds like a Riverside miniature golf course.
9. Make our investment bankers dance in suits a la the dancers in “The Power.” If they’re going to cost us hundreds of billions of dollars in bailout funds, the least they can do is entertain us by doing the Cabbage Patch and the Roger Rabbit.
8. The high-top fades in the video are a stark reminder that American prosperity in the 80s was not the result of laissez-faire economic policy and trickle-down theory, but instead, our hip-hop and R&B stars’ willingness to defy gravity with their hair.
General Rule of Thumb: It’s Invariably a Safe Bet To Trust Someone With “Turbo” in Their Name
7. Turbo B boasts his lyrics are “copywritten so they can’t be stolen.” A respect of intellectual property is a must for any potential economic czar. Or not.
6. Penny Ford should sing at the next G-8 meeting. Not for crisis-resolving purposes, but because she is awesome and the Germans will love it. If this succeeds, next time use KLF.
5. Playing “The Power” at an ear-splitting volume can’t help but inspire the banking industry, the American people and people who wear leather in the summetime. Faith will be fully restored in the markets. If you can’t have faith whilst listening to “The Power,” there is something criminally wrong with you. Bruce Almighty is the proof.
4. Turbo B maintains a firm grasp on the direness of the predicament, declaring, “it’s getting, it’s getting, it’s getting kind of hectic.” No need to ramrod B.S. about “the strong fundamentals of the economy” down our throats. He gets it.
Though You’ve Would’ve Thought Someone Would’ve Told Them That The Title Script Looks Perilously Close to “The Boner”
3. As Turbo B trenchantly avers, “he has a radical mind, day and night, all the time…7/14 wise divine/maniac/brainiac winning the game/I’m the lyrical Jesse James.”
Clearly, T.B. has innovative and new solutions to solve the fiscal catastrophe. Just like McCain’s secret strategy of how to get Bin Laden, Turbo B doesn’t need to explicitly spell out his radical solutions. He’s a brainiac. Where you at Bernanke….bitch. The guy’s a lyrical Jesse James. You know what Jesse James gets? Money.
2. An advocate of a muscular foreign policy, Turbo B understands that “if you don’t stay off his back, he will attack and you don’t want that.” Cooperation is a wise move during a crisis but I for one want someone who can take charge–by rapping. Or at the very least dating an Italian Supermodel.
1. Snap couldn’t do much worse than Bush and Congress.
Download:
MP3: Snap-”The Power”
8 comments
floodwatch says:
October 15, 2008 at 3:38 am (UTC -7)
Hilarious. I would love to see a recurring “Old Cassette Singles” thing going on here.
naedoo says:
October 15, 2008 at 6:47 am (UTC -7)
Chill Rob G. frowns on this top ten list.
Passion of the Weiss says:
October 15, 2008 at 8:09 am (UTC -7)
Only Chill Rob G understands the tenuousness of Snap’s claims to uphold Intellectual Property
Zilla Rocca says:
October 15, 2008 at 9:17 am (UTC -7)
If Talib Kweli had Turbo B’s voice, he’d be the greatest rapper of all time.
Liston says:
October 15, 2008 at 1:10 pm (UTC -7)
Dude, I love Snap. I wrote a concert review for the Houston Press back in December of last year and the concert stands out in my mind only because of its relation to Snap. Here’s how the review began:
“9:48: Walking towards Fitzgerald’s, I pass a homeless guy sitting next to his ten-speed bicycle with a boom box strapped to the back. He’s got the radio turned up and is singing his heart out. And what is Homeless Boom Box Guy’s song of choice? Why, “The Power,” by Snap, of course. I’d better stay off his back, or he will attack, and I don’t want that.”
I am so going to get a flattop today.
-SS
CommishCH says:
October 15, 2008 at 2:20 pm (UTC -7)
How was there two songs out at the same time with the same beat, same hook, same title, but by two different groups— that was a question that seriously f*cked with my young mind in 1990.
Good stuff brah.
Travis says:
October 17, 2008 at 3:31 pm (UTC -7)
While we are at it, I think the presidential election should be decided by a dance off to this song. You would have to expect Obama to win, since any broken hips would result in automatic disqualification.
Passion of the Weiss » Blog Archive » Why KLF’s “3 a.m. Eternal” Continues To “Rock Me” 17 Years Later says:
October 31, 2008 at 12:46 am (UTC -7)
[...] Like Snap’s epic economic treatise, “The Power.” “3 a.m. Eternal” features a garbled, heavily accented, crypto-Communist message at the [...]