It was surreal enough to get 21st row seats to the BET Awards, complete with a prime view of both the stage and the talent coming to and from their seats. But watching the Reverend Al absolutely murder it in rehearsals in front of just 100 people was downright unforgettable. Needless to say, this post needs 5,000 words, several long walks, three bottles of water, two cups of coffee and enough marijuana to feed a Marin County family of four. But there’s no time for that, so we’ll all just have to make due and sulk. In bullet point form.
- With James Brown in the grave, Al Green is probably the greatest soul singer alive. Watching that man sing is like watching the Pope shuffle potential pedophile priests: smooth, efficient and just a little too easy (like this joke). When everyone broke into a group-sing-along during “Let’s Stay Together,” I got more chills than I have at any point this year. The only possible exception being the time my waitress at an Ethiopian restaurant accidentally spilled beer on my lap.
- Young Jeezy was spotted with what Raekwon might have called an F.C.A. (fly colored Asian.) While her figure certainly seemed proportional to Sir Mix-A-Lot’s anatomical charts for rap guy’s girlfriends, I had always thought that Jeezy liked white girls.
- I kind of miss the beef element that Rap Awards Shows used to have. Not that I want to see anyone get hurt or anything, but watching Yeezy, Weezy, Jeezy and T-Peezy (?) put flowers in each other’s hair made me grow nostalgic for the days when Suge Knight would make fun of Puffy for dancing in videos in shiny suits and Ghost would brag about bringing 200 “untitleds” with swords.
T-Wayne nee T-Pain: Subtly Letting the World Know What Else He And Wayne Did in California
- If there is love in “this club,” I’m reasonably certain that I don’t want to know about it.
- Does Nelly think that just because he comes out shirtless and buff that somehow it will make people forget that he’s still Nelly in the year 2008?
- I Interviewed Nas’ for about two minutes. He spoke in cliches and is shorter than you’d expect. I got to interview Big Boi for about two minutes as well. We talked briefly about the show and Sir Lucious Leadfoot. He made sure that I knew that Lucious doesn’t have an “s” in it, because he’s not soft. When I gushed stannishly (no T-Wayne) how much I liked “Royal Flush,” he told me it was going to have 15 other tracks equally good. While I doubt that’s going to happen, I do think that Big Boi has it in him to make a truly great solo album. Rule #1, leave the Purple Ribbon Crew other than Killer Mike at home.
- If it is at all possible, I highly advise you to find a clip of DJ Khaled, Rick Ross, Flo Rida and T-Pain’s set. It involved a circus motif, pink unicorns and T-Pain dressed up in a suit with silver sparkles, making him look like a cross between a Happy Hardcore Candy Raver and the Wizard of Oz. There were also dancing video ho’s on stilts and midgets breathing fire. Which means that someone at some point, found the performance medley a bit too lacking and felt that the situation demanded fire-eating midgets. There is an SNL skit in here waiting to be written.
DJ Khaled: The Brian Scalabrine of Hip-Hop
- Is it too much to ask Rick Ross to wear a shirt once in a while. I don’t know if dude has watched one Dove soap commercial too many and somehow arrived at the conclusion that moobs are sexy. You never saw Biggie shirtless. The Fat Boys never conformed to industry pressures to appear topless on camera. Hell, when Heavy D finally “found love” at least the overweight lover had the decency to wait until after the video to take his shirt off.
- It’s beyond me why someone as beautiful as Rihanna continues to rock the Grace Jones look. Hey, I get it, we all like “My Jamaican Guy” but there was a reason why Grace Jones looked like that: cocaine. Lots of it.
- A particularly surprising and awesome part of the show came when Alicia Keys’ snoozer of a set morphed into a girl band tribute from the 90s featuring SWV, En Vogue and TLC. Jade must be pissed. Sadly, Steve Sanders wasn’t on the nominating committee.
LA Times-Green Day at the Shrine
MP3: Al Green-”Let’s Stay Together”
MP3: Al Green-”Love and Happiness”
MP3: Grace Jones-”My Jamaican Guy”
9 comments
DocZeus says:
June 27, 2008 at 5:44 am (UTC -7)
Actually, Biggie went shirtless in the “Warning’ video. Although, somehow it didn’t seem nearly as gross as Rick Ross in “The Boss” video. That’s also maybe because Biggie is Biggie, and Rick Ross is…well, Rick Ross.
wade word says:
June 27, 2008 at 7:41 am (UTC -7)
He is the fattest boss that I’ve seen thus far.
Paige-CyberPR says:
June 27, 2008 at 9:08 am (UTC -7)
Al Green is amazing, Im so glad he got the attention he deserved this year.
padraig says:
June 27, 2008 at 9:48 am (UTC -7)
“Rule #1, leave the Purple Ribbon Crew other than Killer Mike at home.”
Certainly, but on the flipside have as many Killer Mike guest spots as possible. I’m talking RAGU style here, or basically an OutKast album with Mike replacing 3 Stacks. even though Dre’s been back in stellar form for a minute now, I can think of few things better than a Big Boi/Mike extravaganza.
must disagree heartily on Grace Jones. a very unconventional beauty but imo a stunning one nonetheless (15+ yrs ago obv.). not for everyone I know – Rick Ross’ boobs are about 10 times bigger.
Suckapunkin' says:
June 27, 2008 at 3:16 pm (UTC -7)
I’m Still In Love With You, one of the top 10 albums ever recorded?
Dart_Adams says:
June 27, 2008 at 8:54 pm (UTC -7)
In normal Angry East Coast Black Man Over Thirty fashion I declined to watch the BET Awards and instead went online looking for a copy of the British film “Adulthood”. I read about what happened on Miss Info’s blog. It sounded like a Mad TV skit come to life.
One.
Johnny Dazzle says:
June 30, 2008 at 5:33 pm (UTC -7)
I believe it is factually inaccurate to say that James Brown is in the grave. If I’m not mistaken, he is still above ground, waiting for someone to decide what the hell to do with his body, and who gets to make that decision. That doesn’t make Al Green any less great though.
Trey Stone says:
July 1, 2008 at 2:51 am (UTC -7)
you try too hard to be funny man. i mean it might be better than me (i generally don’t try, this is my serious face) but still.
still a good blog though even though i disagree with you on about everything. except of course the undeniable retardation of DJ Khaleed. and cool shit about interviewing Nas and Big Boi
I love Joi says:
July 1, 2008 at 5:26 pm (UTC -7)
“Jade must be pissed”… Classic.