10 Possible Things That May Have “Happened To That Boy” Judging from the Clipse & Birdman Song of the Same Title
10. After noticing a spare copy of Pigeon Racer Digest: the Thinking Person’s Journal of Racing Pigeons in the Hot Boys’ trailer,* “that boy” decided to join the American Racing Pigeon Union and make a go of it in the wide world of ornithology.
9. Decided to leave Magnolia because hanging out with Baby during his “bird-calling” phase soon became unbearable. Like it was the funny and cool the first few dozen times but soon it got really old. Like Austin Powers jokes old. Eventually, this also led to B.G.’s decision to leave Cash Money.
Who Else Would Be Willing To Employ The Sporty Thievez?
8. Due to NAFTA,”that boy” lost his job to a more cost-efficient Mexican pigeon clapper.
7. Became the subject of a revelatory Roald Dahl work.
Malice Was Actually More of a Charlie And the Great Glass Elevator Guy
6. Currently, delegated to being Wayne’s third-string lip gloss holder.
5. Pusha-T got him an apprenticeship at a Chinchilla furrier in an Italian neighborhood in Virginia Beach.
4. After being disposed of properly by Birdman and Clipse, “that boy” was thought to be dead due to his waxen pallor. Instead, it seems that he survived the attack and went on to one day join the Arcade Fire.
Let’s Just Say That There Are Many Funny Things To Do To This Photo Provided You are 12-years Old and Have a Mastery of Photo Shop.**
3. Went to the impossible-to-find desert island that Pharell’s talent abandoned him for.
2 . After begging for his life, Birdman forgave “that boy” for snitching and allowed him to run his thriving school of avian mesmerism.
1. He was traded away in a three-team deal involving Philly’s Most Wanted, Gillie Da Kid, five Birdman medallions and three Cash Money Millionaires to Be Named Later.
* Turk briefly contributed to the magazine for a short stretch in the mid-90s.
** The idea that forms the basis of Perez Hilton’s entire career.
Stumble It!
June 19th, 2008 at 3:52 am
a couple things i forgot to ask pharrell in my open letter:
+ “remember when even the wack rappers got incredible beats from you (i.e. ‘what happened to that boy,’ ‘cross the border’)?”
+ “remember when, in addition to clipse, n.o.r.e. got your best beats? seriously, N.O.R.E.?!?!?”
June 19th, 2008 at 8:20 am
“Grimey” by NORE is one of my favorite Neptunes beats ever.
But this one just might be #1.
June 19th, 2008 at 9:25 am
Yeah, this is just a great song. If Hell Hath No Fury had beats half as good as this one it would’ve been the classic everyone wanted it to be.
June 19th, 2008 at 10:34 am
” If Hell Hath No Fury had beats half as good as this one it would’ve been the classic everyone wanted it to be.”
Personally, I thought the beats on Hell Hath No Fury were great.
June 19th, 2008 at 10:46 am
About half of them were great and half were experiments in minimalism gone terribly awry.
June 19th, 2008 at 9:52 pm
i’m with you, zeus. i thought hell hath had incredible beats. jeff’s not into minimal experiments much. something tells me he hates phillip glass. [yuk, yuk; music-nerd joke.]
“grimey” by n.o.r.e. was a classic beat, but what about “full mode?” that beat was a fucking BANGER. but it was a deep track on an album that wasn’t any good. that beat is fucking nuts, though. “grindin’,’ “what happened,” “caught out there” and “full mode” are my favorite non-clipse neptunes tracks.