- Nothing says “epic video” more than a hourglass filled with shifted sands. Nothing.
- I’m fairly certain that “Remember the Time” is actually an alternative history suggesting the importance of New Jack Swing to the ancient Egyptians. Hieroglyphics that were once thought to have depicted the everyday life of the people were instead merely capturing them in the midst of the Cabbage Patch. If there are any Egyptologists out there reading the Passion of the Weiss (if so, you should probably stop now), I highly advise you to look further into this phenomenon.
- I imagine that whoever suggested that the video feature feral cats running around as to be historically acccurate was very pleased with himself. You can almost hear a hare-brained label guy screaming, “Cats, we need more cats!”
- The decision to cast Eddie Murphy as the Pharoahe reeks suspiciously of the plot of Coming to America. Not like this is a bad thing. Re-watching “Remember the Time,” I’m half-expecting someone to bath him and declare that the “royal penis is clean.”
The 80s: A Great Decade for Men Named Akeem
- Iman being bored is a pretty realistic touch. Maybe Eddie had been forcing her to watch Harlem Nights on repeat. But I mean, couldn’t he just perform segments from Delirious and/or Raw whenever things got slow in the palace?
- Even as a lowly armed guard, Magic Johnson is the very definition of showtime.
- Note to self. Head to local occult store to purchase magical black powder that allows for teleporting. Also purchase comfortable, loose-fitting black robe.
- If Iman really was such a tough entertainment critic willing to order the death of poor “Stickman” and “Pyro” why didn’t she tell Bowie not to make Never Let Me Down?
- Hey Timberlake, this is how you do it. “”What Goes Around” was a joke compared to “Remember the Time.” Scarjo? That’s ephemeral. Eddie Murph circa Raw, Magic Johnson taking it to Isaiah Thomas in the NBA Finals. That’s just timeless.
Isaiah and Magic: The Birdman and Lil Wayne of the 80s
- Granted, he is the middle kingdom’s finest magician/dancer (and not the other way around), but the concept of Michael Jackson stealing Pharoahe Eddie Murphy’s girl remains downright laughable. Particularly, when said girl is Iman. Did the decision to cast the Somalian supermodel have something to do with her known predilection for androgynous, possibly gay genius types?
- Did Arsenio just get sick or something and have to be absent the day of the shoot?
- New Jack Swing: It works on so many levels.
- Despite being able to dance like a god, Michael Jackson runs like a girl. This video proves it. This is the polar opposite of the situation in Major League where manager Lou Brown discovers that Willie Mays Hayes runs like Mays but hits “like shit.”
Tom Berenger in Major League: Great Performance or Greatest Performance?
- When chasing homicidal guards in an ancient Egyptian palace it is imperative to note the importance of taking time out to periodically pause to bust out a few killer dance moves and play with adorable little children.
- Snakes in a basket? Always a crafty deterrant.
- Walking like an Egyptian? Always a good idea.
- MJ and Iman’s kiss is the arguably the least believable on-screen make out in the post-George Michael era. Though if there was any on-screen chemistry between the King of Pop and Iman, it inevitably stemmed from Eddie Murphy’s inexplicable decision to sing “Party all the Time” all the time during “love-making.”
- Not only is this the last great New Jack Swing song, but this video signaled the last great gasp of the 80s. It would be all downhill for Jacko, Magic and Murph after this one. But watching it again inevitably triggers nostalgia for a time when they were on top, in those halcyon days before The Magic Hour.
MP3: Michael Jackson-”Remember the Time”
10 comments
Remembering the Time: Minor Epiphanies Gleaned Upon Re-Watching … says:
February 12, 2008 at 2:06 am (UTC -7)
[...] InfinityPro wrote an interesting post today onHere’s a quick excerptGranted, he is the middle kingdom’s finest magician/dancer (and not the other way around), but the concept of Michael Jackson stealing Pharoahe Eddie Murphy’s girl remains downright laughable. Particularly, when said girl is Iman. … [...]
Dart_Adams says:
February 12, 2008 at 8:30 am (UTC -7)
Other items of interest:
I love that you use Monch’s in/famous spelling of “Pharaoh”.
Imam looks like Nefertiti’s sister’s daughter….kinda sorta.
Jossie was still sporting the braids that made her famous. Soon she would become one of the Fly Girls and graduate to Janet Jackson backup dancer and then an actress.
Big Lez also did her thing in this video. She’s famous for her appearances in LL Cool J’s “Around The Way Girl” among other videos and being a host on BET’s Rap City. Now she has a morning radio show.
At least Teddy Riley ACTUALLY produced this track and didn’t pass it off on Redhead Kingpin or Pharrell Williams. Teddy was famous for putting his name on younger producers’ work and keep 90% of the money to work on big name clients material.
When Mike first appeared the Queen got all moist and whatnot. Sooo unbelievable. Prince? Maybe. Mike “The A.C. Green Of Pop” Jackson? HELLLLS NO!
Mike had been doing the same damn dance moves since his “Bad” album dropped. Imagine if homie from Solid Gold never taught him the moonwalk? Would people still regard Mike as such an amazing dancer. He pretty much relied on others to provide him moves. Chris Rock was right. Prince won.
The guards are so swole that they can’t even move well. Mike is all quick and nimble so as to avoid capture following a quick cup and fondle. One spin and he’s back in Neverland Ranch.
Here Lies New Jack Swing, bastard child of Hip Hop and Rhythm & Blues
May It Rest In Peace (And NEVER Come Back)
1986-1993
One.
Jayson Greene says:
February 12, 2008 at 9:12 am (UTC -7)
“this video signaled the last great gasp of the 80s.”
Except it was the 90s. Or is this more of a figurative, 80s-as-state-of-mind sorta thing? Either way, good post.
wadeword says:
February 12, 2008 at 9:46 am (UTC -7)
Much worse musical movements have been around than New Jack Swing, ie. the 6 months when every song was produced by Lil Jon.
Just because MJ didnt invent every move he used doesnt mean he wasn’t a great dancer. I’d wager that most performers in the spotlight have choreographers feeding them moves.
Thanks for the memory jog, JW.
padraig says:
February 12, 2008 at 9:46 am (UTC -7)
The only Egyptologist I know of is the dude from Nile, the death metal band – I saw em’ a few years ago and they were wearing GIANT ankh necklaces that kept flying around every time they tried to headbang. I had a mental image of that dude all excited to read into your take on how “Remember the Time” related to Egyptology, and the crestfallen look on his face when he came across that warning for Egyptologists to stop reading.
Isn’t one of the 5%er offshoots/imitators/competitors (not going to front like I really know how to differentiate) really into Egyptology? Or maybe actual 5%ers? It’s a little bit before my time but I feel like X-Clan or Lakim Shabazz or someone less famous was probably rapping about pyramids back in ’89. Or if they weren’t, they should have been – Egyptology seems like the kind of pseudoscience that would fit in perfectly – maybe RZA can grace us with a Bobby Digital concept album about ancient Egypt.
Disco Vietnam says:
February 12, 2008 at 10:11 am (UTC -7)
Why should the 5% have to talk about pyramids? We created the universe!
Passion of the Weiss says:
February 12, 2008 at 11:29 am (UTC -7)
Dart: The “let me fill in the blanks as to help Jeff look less ignorant” is my favorite part of every post. Thanks for the knowledge dropped as always. The AC Green line is brilliant.
Jayson: I meant in in the figurative sense kind of how everyone said 9/11 “ended the 90s” so this put a final seal on the weirdness that was the 80s.
WW: Crunk. All I can says is egads.
P: Don’t say that too long, Digital will make that happen. It’s not too far a stretch from they had ears of corn and heads of lettuce.
DV: Nice point. Pretty pretty good.
Cashew says:
February 12, 2008 at 5:07 pm (UTC -7)
Leave it to PotW to dip into “Dangerous” during the week the industry wants us to remember “Thriller”.
Tauwan says:
February 12, 2008 at 5:39 pm (UTC -7)
Micheal Jackson least believable moments of sexual chemistry in the 90′s:
1. “MJ and Iman’s kiss is the arguably the least believable on-screen make out in the post-George Michael era.”,
2. Making out with Lisa Marie Presley at that MTV awards show way back when,
3. Carousing about [in the nude?] with Lisa Marie Presley in the video for you are not alone, and
4. The New Jack Swing whip appeal Michael put on display in the video for In the Closet. The one where we’re supposed to believe that he can court and woo Naomi Campbell [...in a song with the refrain "Keep it in the closet!"] Though he was looking somewhat respectable in the looks department for him in said video. Did I just type that? yes, yes I did.
m.dot says:
February 15, 2008 at 11:34 pm (UTC -7)
I imagine that whoever suggested that the video feature feral cats running around as to be historically acccurate was very pleased with himself. You can almost hear a hare-brained label guy screaming, “Cats, we need more cats!
========
I can only imagine what your imagination was like as a young buck. You prolly had the bugged out tree house and imaginary robot alien friends.
LOL…